so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Randomize
