I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
