we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Im part way to drunk.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
