Texts From Last Night

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  (518): View more from New York

  I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.

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  (518): I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese. http://tfl.nu/65in
  Replies (29) Good night (10958) Bad night (925)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?

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  (301): Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands? http://tfl.nu/6ufe
  Replies (34) Good night (2442) Bad night (3206)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.

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  (504): I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine. http://tfl.nu/uiwl
  Replies (27) Good night (3157) Bad night (1164)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it

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  (940): just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it http://tfl.nu/6p5c
  Replies (50) Good night (1016) Bad night (4941)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.

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  (443): The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of. http://tfl.nu/c44a
  Replies (20) Good night (4489) Bad night (1114)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame

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  (914): Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame http://tfl.nu/j5ak
  Replies (9) Good night (2933) Bad night (1366)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.

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  (248): he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg. http://tfl.nu/hgt4
  Replies (24) Good night (1380) Bad night (5144)
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  (626): View more from California

  You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin

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  (626): You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin http://tfl.nu/mf5k
  Replies (6) Good night (2471) Bad night (1173)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve

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  (412): Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve http://tfl.nu/y29u
  Replies (11) Good night (3249) Bad night (866)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka

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  (618): I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka http://tfl.nu/yt16
  Replies (4) Good night (1836) Bad night (1327)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.

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  (910): Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down. (803): Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you. http://tfl.nu/a5n4
  Replies (8) Good night (1879) Bad night (908)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.

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  (413): I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing. http://tfl.nu/qpjl
  Replies (11) Good night (540) Bad night (2031)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?

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  (401): Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer? http://tfl.nu/q3x6
  Replies (4) Good night (808) Bad night (431)
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  (516): View more from New York

  This is classic penis vs brain.

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  (516): This is classic penis vs brain. http://tfl.nu/3vjt
  Replies (6) Good night (697) Bad night (358)
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success

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  (219): Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success http://tfl.nu/6h9g
  Replies (0) Good night (367) Bad night (212)

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