Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia