Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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