after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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