Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
