you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
