My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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