I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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