I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
