so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
