is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize