We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Ladies don't puke and tell
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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