everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
it's like iHOP with fire
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
