turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Randomize
