She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
