What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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