Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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