? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
