I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
