There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
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