at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
My vagina is officially offended.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize