I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
