i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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