someone owes me an orgasm
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
