I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize