Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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