school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I want her autograph on my taint
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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