nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
