i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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