STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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