I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize