He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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