i don't like sucking hair
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
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