I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize
