i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I want to stick my p in your. b.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
