i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
