I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
