So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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