Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
