I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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