he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
