My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
