worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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