just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
