So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in