Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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