I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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