Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
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