white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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