yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
