My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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